Here I am...again.

Oh I remember you my friend. It's been so long since you've last come to visit. I don't have to ask you how you've been though right? Everytime you're around I choke and I find it hard to breathe. Yet again my friend. You've tricked me. Lead me into that dark hole of nothingness. Thanks you know. I was doing fine without you. I even told myself I will never ever let you in anymore. Never. But yet somehow. You always have a way of slipping yourself through my defences eh. Smart motherfucker.

Now I wonder, when are you gonna leave?

What If...

It's been quite a while since I've blogged. Guess I've lost the interest in it. I'm leaving for Korea 36 hours. I don't know if I want to come back once I'm there. They say there's no place like home. Well, it's true. But there's not much of a future for me here. The environment I'm growing in, the government, the people. There's not much hope for someone with a mindset like mine over here. I just can't find the rainbow leading to the pot of gold. The light at the end of the tunnel. The bridge to cross this rapid river. As far as I might get over here, I would still need that last piece of brick, the last piece of the puzzle, the password to open the door to the other side. Someone to share it with. I find no hope into finding someone like that here anymore. You were the last one Shelly. As for now that is. But even so, how long has it been? A year and a half now since I've fallen in love with you? That long eh...I've never loved anyone this long before. You're the first. You were my pot of gold at the end of my rainbow, my light at the end of my tunnel, the greener grass on the other side. I've been wanting to post this up saying what I've been feeling all this time but I guess I didn't have the courage to. But, like I said, you were the last. And as for now, I don't see anyone that comes as close to you. Every day, everywhere I go, when I look around me and I see a couple, I just turn my head away. I can't bare to look at the happiness that's just overflowing from them. It's suffocating. I sigh every time I see couples holding hands, smiling at each other, knowing that the person next to them loves them as well. It happens when I look at a girl that's pretty or cute or good looking too. I just look at them and think, "Her? What are you thinking about Imran? Are you dreaming?". I guess it's a fear that's developed in me like a virus slowly eating me. It doesn't kill me though. It just kills my self confidence in women. Slowly biting away at my confidence, my pride, my dignity. I don't blame you though, not as much as I love you my dear. I was quite angry at the fact you got together with someone of a difference race in early 2010 though. I don't know how much of this information is true but, oh well, it's the only information I have of you. I thought to myself, where is the justice in that? Here I was, standing, literally down on my knees willingly in love with you and you chose him? I guess, you thought I wasn't the one that you would sacrifice your relationship with your parents for. Maybe he was, I don't know. But I know I would've been good to you. Loyal to you. I would've loved you with all my heart. But maybe you didn't believe me at the time. Strangely, after you I had one relationship. And she didn't want to sacrifice for me as well. Not her parents though, cuz I met practically her whole family in just 2 months. She wasn't willing to sacrifice herself for me. But either way, maybe I just wasn't the one for you Shelly. Understood. But what I learnt is that there is no such thing as "The one". Fictional it is. Sugar-coated. We make do with what we have. Just like however we have been living out lives. I get RM10 a day as allowance. I make do with it. I make things work with just that RM10. But what I'm trying to say is, I'm in love with you Shelly and as funny as it seems, when I close my eyes every night, no matter how hard I try to dream of something else, you're always in it right before I fall asleep. Day by day by day. Everyday. Strange ain't it? Strange how love for a certain person can stick with you even after a year and a half. I just hope it doesn't turn out to be like that movie "Letters to Juliet". After 50 years. That's a long time to be in love with someone you haven't seen for 50 years. Just like how the last time I saw you was your prom. How beautiful you looked that day (I'm sorry I'm only mentioning how beautiful you looked now). But nevertheless, I love you Shelly. I still do. I don't know if I'm waiting for anything or if I'm the only one feeling this way or whatever. I don't know shit. But all I know is that after falling in love with in June 2009, I still can't forget you Shelly Tan. I just can't to forget you. I'm...in love with you still.

Italian eyes

Wind chimes whisper on ears invisible,

Chitter chatter of the raindrops on green,

Burring roars of mechanisms disrupts,

Swinging givers of life calms,

Melody plays on a runaway train,

Words aboard the express of the unseen,

Slow thump of a cage grows hard and slow,

Letters pressed on technology appears,

What logic seems forsaken.

It's raining

Ever so constant the patting of the rain,

Flowing following the surface it hits,

How different it can be from the person across the street,

I laugh,

You smile,

She tears,

He cries,

Hidden beneath the teardrops of heaven.

Listen to the patting of the rain,

What do you feel my friend across the street?

Eyes closed heart opened wide,

What does the teardrop of heaven tell you?

Sense it feel it,

See no eyes would see,

Feel no fingers would feel,

How do you feel?

It is true

It is true that sometimes we have to go through all the shit to suddenly stumble upon the flower.

It is true when they say you have to kiss many to find one.

It is true when they say you have to stop searching to be found.

It is true when they say you have to be a complete asshole when you were younger to realize how truly fucking amazing life and love really is.

It is true when they say you have to fuck around in love to really love someone.

It is true that you have to fight for everything you thought were right to find out that you were wrong and finally find the right.

It is true that you have to find someone who has done almost, exactly or even more shit than you have to come to realize that hey, it's time to do something about yourself.

It is true that you have to stop saving in order to be saved.

It is true that you have a second chance in life to do what's right.

It is true.

This I promise

I'll never have my children go through what I had to go through.

And I'll never stop loving my parents.

I'll never give up.

Good Times

Have you ever had a feeling deep in your heart that you can never get rid off? A feeling of emptiness. It feels like, nothing in the world now can satisfy you, make you happy and make this feeling go away. I don't know if you guys have. But I used to have it. Not often, but there was a few times.

Now, every night when I come home and take a shower, I have this feeling. Always. For the past week night. Every single night without fail. Today I got so angry and I kept wondering why? Why am I having this feeling. It felt like no matter what I do or anyone does, can make this feeling of emptiness go away.

Why now...When I have so much to worry about.

Why...

11-1 Win

No that's not the score of my hockey match tonight. It was the score my team made when I was about 15 of 16 where I scored 5 goals and assisted 3. Tonight's scores was 3-1. We won. It was a good game. But it made me think. In the duration of time during 14 years old and 17 years old. I've never lost more than 10 games. There was one time where we won 15 games or so and only drew once. I scored an average of 20 goals per season with about 15 assists at average. That's 35 points every season on average. I've seen so many fights and injuries. I have a spinal injury that happened to me when I was about 16 where I skated into someone and fell flat on my tailbone. Strangely, my tailbone protector moved out of the way so up until now, the pain comes and goes. Like tonight. A friend of mine was skating fast to the boards and tripped on someones stick and he flew head first to the boards. Resulting in a neck injury. He couldn't move his neck at all. He even said that he couldn't feel his toes. He's now in the hospital.

But all these winnings I've had, especially today's, made me ponder. I've won over 100 official games and another 100 or so unofficial games. Scored over 400 goals officially and unofficially. Have around 200 assists. Played for the national team and winning silver against Macao, Thailand, Singapore, Hong Kong, Chinese Taipei.

Though I have all these winnings.

All these glory.

All these medals.

I've never once won in the game of love.

We are only human

Here I am,
Listening to what seems like a never ending song playing in my heart.
A song that only my closest of friends understand.
A song we sing together.

For how we wished that what we dreamed of were true.
All those ridiculous dreams.
All those perfect endings.
All the love we felt in our dreams.

As our eyes open slowly,
Destroyed our dreams are.
Here we are now.
Reality.

We can never run from it.
We can never hide away from the truth of life.
Hard.
How hard can it be?

When all we do seems like living.
But living is only to what we seem is material.
We pass our tasks.
We smell the sweet smell of that green back paper.

Yet when we go home we feel empty.
For all this money,
Where does it go to?
What do I do with it?

We pass our unwillingly taken on tasks.
We don't do it well.
But we live.
But are we really living?

Seemingly there is a void in our souls.
An emptiness.
A hole right in the middle of our hearts.
A deep dark hole filled with nothingness.

For we search for something to fill the hole.
We search.
We look.
We scavenge.

For we know what is true.
Life is nothing.
Nothing is life.
Without that hole being filled.

We extended our arms out so far.
As far and long as we could.
Though unreachable,
We knew we'd give it our all.

We knew what we wanted.
And what we wanted knew.
But here comes the punch.
The stab.

The creator of the hole.
The aftermath of an explosion.
The blood bled with our lives.
The strike from behind.

For we could never see what is coming.
For that reason,
We are human.
And yet people don't understand that.

We're all humans.
We all need something.
We all want the same thing.
We all search.

Only some may find it.
Some may find it but lose it.
To something.
An uncontrollable force of recognition.

Whatever it may be.
Whatever it is.
We're human.
We all bleed and breathe the same air.

We all make mistakes.
We all do things we regret.
We all hurt each other with things we want to say.
We all slowly die.

For we do not live.
We are slowly dying.
What separates the minor from the major.
What separates the open and closed.

Are the ones that never give up.
The ones that think of their cup as half full,
Not empty.
The ones that accept reality but dream of making dreams a reality.

For we are all human.
We should be more afraid of the dark.
For light holds our vision.
Dark holds our unknowingly reserved potential.

The potential to do anything we want.
This is what the dark possesses.
For we are all humans.
Fear should only be to the endless possibilities we posses.

The sense of making the impossible,
Possible.
Those who fear life and what it brings are not living in reality.
The reality is,

We are humans.

The reality is,

Our darkness gives us light.

The reality is,

In life, you and I should fight for what our ideals are. What we know is right. Not what is told to us by others. For one should never let someone else tell you, you can not do it. Because you can.

Because we're human

By Andrew McMahon for you

I can't imagine all the people that you know
And the places that you go
When the lights are turned down low
And I don't understand all the things you've seen
But I'm slipping in between
You and your big dreams
It's alwayS you
In my big dreams
And you tell me that its over
Wake up lying in a patch of four leaf clovers
And your restless
And I'm naked
You gotta get out
You cant stand to see me shaking
No
Could u let me go?
I didn't think so
And you don't wanna be here in the future
So you say the presents just a pleasant interruption to the past
And you don't wanna look much closer
Cause you're afraid to find out all this hope
You had sent into the sky by now had
Crashed
And it did
Because of me

And then you bring me home
Afraid to find out that your alone oh
And I'm sleeping in your living room
But we don't have mucH room to live

And i had these dreams in them i learned to play guitar
Maybe cross the country
Become a rock star
And there was hope in me that I could take you there
But damn it you're so young
Well I don't think i care
And if i hurt you
Then I'm sorry
Please don't think that this was easy

And then you bring me home
Cause we both know what its like to be alone oh
And I'm dreaming in your living room
But we don't have much room to live

And KonstantinE is walking down the stairs
Doesn't she look good
Standing in her underwear
And I was thinking
What I was thinking
We've been drinking and it doesn't get me anywhere
My Konstantine came walking down the stairs
And all that i could do was touch her long blond hair
And I've been thinking
But it hurts me thinking
That these nights when we were drinking
No they never got us anywhere
No

This is because i can spell confusion with a 'K'
And i can like it
Its to dying in anothers arms
And why i had to try it
Its to jimmy eat world
And those nights in my car
When the first star you see
May not be a star
I'm not your star
Isn't that what you said
What you thought this song meant

And if this is what it takes
Just to Laugh at my mistakes
And live with what i did to you
All the hell i put you through
I always catch the clock
Its 11:11
Now you wanna talk
Its not hard to dream
You'll always be my Konstantine
My Konstantine
They'll never hurt you like i do
No they'll never hurt you like i do
No,no,no, no, no, no, no, no

This is to a girl
Who got into my head
With all the pretty things she did
Hey
You know
You keep me up in bed
This is to a girl
Who got into my head
With all these fucked up things i did
Hey
Maybe
Baby you could keep me up in bed
My Konstantine

You spin around me Like a dream
We played out on this movie screen
And i said
Did u know i miss you?
I miss you

And then you bring me home
And we go to sleep
But this time not alone
And i know
And you'll kiss me in your living room
I know
I know you miss me in your living room
Cuz these nights i think
Maybe that i miss you in my living room
But we don't have much room
I said does anybody need that room
Because we all need a little more room
To live

MY Konstantine...

Volo vos scio ut is eram verus

If I,
Am not the choice of your heart,
Maybe it's fate, destiny,
That you and I,
May never be as one.

You have to always know,
That I love you for all of my time,
You have to always believe,
That this is immortal forever,

Because I believe,
That this love in me,
Is yours and yours only,
May it be until the last of my days.

Because I believe,
That for every breath I take,
It is only you,
That I long for.

So if I,
Am not the choice of your heart,
It matters not,
Because this heart,
Chose you amongst millions others.

Though many say,
Love differs with every person,
But I'm sure,
With all of my heart,
That this one was pure.

Though many say,
It may be just words,
Another will come,
A better one.

Better depends on me,
And I believe,
That,
You were the best I never had.

For that reason,
I'll never forget you.

I'll keep you and this feeling,
In a special place,
In my heart,
Till death takes its toll.

Choose to believe or not,
These words,
It matters not,
For only I know,
That I speak it with altruism.

And though only words,
Believe me when I say,
I am truly sorry.

For all my wrongs,
For all my doings,
For all the heartache I caused,
For everything.

I'm sorry.

I love you.

A never ending argument of a never ending story

If I could have just one wish,
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine.
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you.

Weird isn't it? The question of love where no one can truly define love. Parents say "You are so young, you don't know what love is". Really? You think so? I think not. I think that love is however and whatever you want it to be and whatever you make of it. It doesn't matter how old you are cuz love changes as you grow older. At every different age you think of love differently. We all know what love is but we just can't explain it. You will know when someone is really in love with you when he/she does something out of the ordinary. Something he/she doesn't really do. Even so, the question of true love still leaves me hanging. At this age, I currently believe that there is no such thing as true love cuz as I said, love can be whatever you want it to if you want it. It can be your true love if you want it to be. You just have to work hard at making it come true. Love isn't just gonna walk on your doorstep and say hi to you. No. You have to go out and look for it. No matter how you put it. Even if it may seem to you as if you're waiting for love to hit you smack in the face, in reality, unconsciously it was you that smacked love in the face. You went looking. All occurrences around us happen by our own choice. We choose the roads we want to take and so happens, that road led us to love. We all know that when a person says "I'll love you forever" it isn't true. We can TRY to love each other forever but no one can really be sure right? Believe me when I say this, anything can happen. Anything. I believe in the saying that "Never say never cuz never, never happens". Which is true. You can find love even at this minute if it so happened to happen. You can believe you will never but it will one day. If you keep believing in that saying. But believing isn't enough. You can't just sit there and wait for it to drop from the sky. As I said, get up and go look for it. It may sound desperate but at least, you are taking control of YOUR life. The life you hold. The life given to you. It's yours. Not anyone else but you. You dictate your own life. You say how you wanna live it. You say how you wanna do it. You figure out how it ends. No one else should have a hand in your life except your husband/wife and your children. Not even your parents. Yes they can advice, but it's your choice again to choose to do so. At a certain point of age we should take charge of our own lives. Your husband/wife and children create a bond that will last till the end of your days even if you divorce with your husband/wife is the parent to your child. Like it or not they have a say. Back to love, in every relationship there are arguments and there are disagreements. It's normal. It's part of understanding each other. Always be true to one another. Always. DON'T and I repeat DON'T say you love whoever you're dating until you have accepted him/or her for whoever they are. Acceptance means a lot to your partner. Knowing that you have accepted their good and bad makes them trust you and know that you are understanding. If you say "Don't do this and don't do that cuz I don't like it". If it's already a part of him and it makes him who he is (which is the person you fell in love with) then why even ask him/her not to do it??? It's unfair isn't it? Especially when you say he/she can't do this or that but you can do the things you want to do without him/her questioning it.

We are who we are and you shouldn't change because someone doesn't like what you do or because your partner disagrees.

Love is seeing through the perfection and accepting the imperfections.

~ END ~

Seize the day

Tuesday

• Woke up at 9 am to go to Ridzuan for group assignment
• Reached Ridzuan at 10 am
• Had breakfast there
  
• Started of my Public Relations assignment at 11 am
• Stopped at 12 pm to go to Sri KL with Wai Yik to celebrate Kellie's birthday
• Got back at Ridzuan to continue assignment at 2 pm
• Stopped at 7.30 pm to go to Medan to meet up with Clare, Zac and Al for dinner
  
• Got home at 12 am

Wednesday

• Did Public Relations assignment starting from 12.30 am all the way to 8.00 am and sent it online just in time
• Took a NAP from 8.30 am to 11 am
• Woke up and got ready to go to college to send the hard copy of my assignment to the lecturer which deadline is at 12 pm
• Picked Wai Yik up on the way to college
  
• Reached college at 12 pm
• Remembered had to print out feedback page and had to wait for other people to use the college computer to print their stuff first
• Handed in assignment at 12.30 pm (late)
• Went to Sri KL again at 12.50 pm with Wai Yik cuz he wanted to give Kellie something and I wanted to see Shelly
• Forgot to bring out loan agreement form I was supposed to hand in to college for confirmation so had to go back home before I could go to Ridzuan
• Reached home at 1.45 pm, took loan agreement and sent Wai Yik to Pyramid to meet up with Clare and Zac
• Reached college at 1.55 pm and went to hand in loan agreement but person in charge said there are a few mistakes so I had to redo it again
• Left college and reached Ridzuan at 2.15 pm
• Did ANOTHER assignment which was due on Thursday from then till 8 pm (This time a video whereby I was the main actor)
• Finished the Communications: Rhetoric and Reasoning assignment then went back home to shower and change at 8.15 pm
• Had to go straight back out to meet up with college classmates + Zac for dinner and Dota + Counter-Strike + L4D at Medan
  
• Reached Medan at 8.40 pm and had dinner
• Started playing games at 9.40 pm
• Won Dota and Counter-Strike but lost L4D
• Ended playing games at 2 am
• Reached home at 2.10 am

This is by far the busiest and most stressing week of my degree life. Not even the events we organized during foundation is this bad.

An old injury came back. My lower spine now hurts like a bitch. Feels like there is a nail scrapping my spine. Hopefully I don't have to go for surgery.

But through all that, through all the pain, through all the headaches, through all the worrying, through all the stressing,
the only person I could think about was you.
You

:-)

Be happy dear

Whatever happens

Be happy for me

Keep smiling

=)

The mark

Shelly

If you're reading this right now

I want you to know that I miss you

Very much

=)

2.40 am filled with music and cigarettes

I'll hold you my dear,
Chasing away all your fears,
Even if my body is six feet under,
You don't have to ponder,
I'll be there.

Let me see you smile,
For the last time I'll be gone,
Show me your cheek malfunction,
Let me rest in peace,
Peace with myself.

Don't you worry my darling dear,
As I walk to the valley of the shadow of death,
I'll take a look at my life and realize,
You were my princess,
A princess in disguise,
Glittering with a personality,
Personality of an angel.

I wish our eyes could meet once again,
"Shh" I'll whisper,
Don't say a word,
Let me listen to the beating of your heart,
It says more than words.

Just look into my eyes,
Your eyes speak into mine,
For I will then know,
What you want to say.

But wishes are wishes,
Dreams are dreams,
No prayer of mine could bring time back,
No money could ever buy time lost,
No one could ever replace you.

For the most imperfect reasons,
For all the rules broken,
I still can never forget you,
Your song still plays in my mind.

And it says,

"Two to one, static to the sound of you and I undone for the last time. There this was, hiding at the bottom of your swimming pool some September. Don't you wish that I could stay? Your lips give you away"

Inner thoughts

Friday - At 9 something in the morning I woke up and thought "I feel good today. I don't feel sad. Fuck all my problems"

Suddenly, towards the evening of the day, my heart dropped. All of the sudden. Out of nowhere. I wanted to tell someone so badly how I felt at that point of time. I just needed somebody.

Aaron, Amirul and Wai Yik came and we went for dinner and a yam cha session. In the car Wai Yik asked me if I was okay and I said I was.

But honestly, I was tearing at the backseat of Aaron's car looking outside the window.

I thought about how unlucky I was and how fucked up life was. To love someone you could never have. To find someone so special and one of a kind only to be so close to touching her hand then suddenly right before I'm able to touch her hand, she disappears into thin air.

I had an accident on Thursday. I was driving my dad's car with him in the passenger seat. I admit I am traumatized by it. But when I started crying in Aaron's car. I didn't give two fucks if I died at the spot. I didn't at all.

But what can I do about this situation?

A third party has the say in this.

Seriously, right now I just want to be happy. It's all I want now. Nothing else matters.

But my happiness was robed of me when this started.

My friends, I hope you understand that I am not saying that you guys do not make me happy. You do. With all my heart, you guys are the best group of friends ever. But all of us have that something that makes us truly happy. Some may be music, dancing, working, cooking. It can be anything. Mine is just Shelly.

I love you guys.

Yours sincerely,
Sypher

My adventure

All these experiences I've had. All the problems I went through trying to find the right girl for me. Looking into myself figuring out what was wrong with myself and trying to make myself a better person. All the arguments settled and unsettled. This long journey of the pursuit of love I have gone through for 7 years now. All I know is this, love is never static. Love changes. There is no right answer to explain what love is. Love is like your thumb print. Unique.

Now I look back and think of all the relationships I've gone through. It makes me wanna write a book about my experiences so much. But I don't know where to start. But I know how to end it.

My last story in the book will be about Shelly. How much of a punch in the face it was to me when I realized how useless I felt. So useless, I couldn't do shit about my race and religion. I thought "This is a girl I would love to love. I know I'll be really happy with her and I know I'll be able to make her the happiest girl ever" "I found her", I thought. I did find her, the girl that came so close to perfect. But, I lost her.

"Move on Imran"
"There are many fishes in the sea"
"You'll be okay"
"She's just a girl"
"You can't help it"
"You can't do anything about it"
"Go out and have some fun"
"Let it go dude"

So many different words of comfort given to me. All of them are true and are what I'm supposed to do. I've tried. Honestly, I have. But wait till you find that girl that you've always wanted. And lose her. To an unknown force that pushes you down without your consent. Wait till it happens to you. Then when I say those words to you, see if it makes a difference to you or not. If it does, which is unlikely, then good for you. If it doesn't, then you know how shitty the path of love is.

I feel like my heart has closed its doors. I honestly feel it. The feeling of having no intention, mood or wanting to get to know any other girl. I want to open that door but my conscience tells me otherwise. It's an invisible wall of fear restricting me from opening that door. No matter how much I want to, I can't. Though I force myself to try, it all ends in vain. At the end of the day, that wall just won't break down. I'm so scared that I won't be able to truly open that door.

As I said, that book will contain memories, heartaches and advice regarding relationships. I can say I've been through almost every kind of relationship. I'm not being cocky, but really, I've been in almost every kind. Almost.

I used to think love overcomes everything. Now I'm skeptical of those words. Yes, it is the most powerful and it does overcome anything, but, there are third party forces that sometimes, overpower us.

Honestly, if I could choose anything in life right now. If I had one wish to have anything I've ever wanted. My wish will be happiness. That's all I want. And I found it in Shelly.

Happiness creates memories and memories lasts a lifetime. Money however, runs dry in time. All material wants deteriorates in time. Cars rust and get old, money can run out, clothes can be torn. Your body dies out. But happiness, with it comes love and memories. Those I can bring to my grave. Happy memories can never fade and be forgotten. Love can never rust, torn or die out unless love has been chosen to be ended. Your body dies, but your soul lives on.

I'll end my book with a few words.

"I'll continue to look for it. The ever elusive wonder, love"

Yours truly,
Sypher

The King

I found this song that...Relates so much to what I'm going through right now.

Every line of the song reflects what I wanna say and how I feel these days.

Every line of it.

I dedicate to you Shelly =)

You're the one I want.

Not any other.

Can you still remember
How it seemed that we could live forever in a lovers dream?
And falling was the best part but now you know the things you cling to
Your heart can start to grow.

You, you're walking away.
I've been there now I know what to say... I'm the king of yesterday.

A silly little love song for myself.
It's all I ever do you know I shine the shell.
A pretty little picture, the face of you.
You were my setting sun and now you're every view.

You, you're walking away
I've been there now I know what to say...
I'm the king of yesterday.

Why don't, why don't, why don't you stay?
Why don't you stay? why don't you stay? why don't you stay?

Take a little time, throw it on the line.
Let me believe that you believe in me.
Baby turn around, look at what I found.
You are the one that I want.

Take a little time, throw it on the line.
Let me believe that you believe in me.
Baby turn around, look at what I found.
You were the one that I wanted.

And someday I'll be over on my own.
Believing all the legends of the loves I've known

And seeing you in summer the way we were when you were seventeen
You know I much preferred you walking away.

I've been here, now I know what to say
I'm the king of yesterday.

Why don't, why don't, why don't you stay?
Why don't you stay? why don't you stay with me? stay.

Take a little time, throw it on the line.
Let me believe that you believe in me.
Baby turn around, look at what I found.
You are the one that I want.

Take a little time, throw it on the line.
Let me believe that you believe in me.
Baby turn around, look at what I found.
You were the one that I wanted.

You were the one that I wanted.

King of yesterday.
King of yesterday.

Ps,
I still do

It's 3 am and I must be lonely

All these problems I face makes me want to have more tattoos.

Especially on my arms.

Both in ambigrams.

One will say "Life"

The other will say "Death"

On the left side of my chest I'll tattoo 4 words into wings with a snake around it.

On my back I'll tattoo a scythe.

Whatever I do.

I still can't my mind off of you.

I really miss you.